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CONLANG  February 2014, Week 1

CONLANG February 2014, Week 1

Subject:

Re: OT: Mid-winter greetings

From:

Daniel Bowman <[log in to unmask]>

Reply-To:

Constructed Languages List <[log in to unmask]>

Date:

Tue, 4 Feb 2014 13:40:17 -0500

Content-Type:

text/plain

Parts/Attachments:

Parts/Attachments

text/plain (65 lines)

Christmas sure is lasting a while this year, isn't it?  In fact, silly
white powder shut down schools for several days.  I hope Christmas is over
soon.


2014-02-04 Puey McCleary <[log in to unmask]>:

> It's interesting that languages, or rather the cultures that speak these
> languages, have competing systems by which to reckon the seasons.  On the
> one hand there's the desire to make everything uniform, to make seasons
> line up to equinoxes and some significant number -- usually four but
> perhaps even six.  On the other hand, the weather patterns that we
> experience and the actual culture in which we live sometimes don't
> correspond to the official seasons at all.
>
> Where I live, there are basically only two seasons of the year: Christmas
> and Summer -- or as I often call Summer, "Not Yet Christmas."  All of the
> rest of the seasons are crammed between these two big ones.  So the year is
> basically an Oreo cookie.  Or an apple pie, I suppose.
>
> Summer is the longest season of the year, so I'll mention it first.  It
> usually lasts about six months, except for those years when it lasts much,
> much, much longer.
>
> Summer begins at the beginning of April, after all of the wisteria have
> bloomed.  We know it's summer, because flowers have stopped being all silly
> with all their bright colors.  To make up for it, we humans wear the silly
> bright colors.  The big mid-summer celebration occurs on July 4th, when we
> wear our silliest colors, have a ritual feast out of doors, and blow up
> small parts of our yard using firecrackers.  Some people think this
> celebration has something to do about a legend in which George the Winter
> King was banished from our land, and we have to scare him away with little
> shining burning sticks.  What makes this story quite confusing is that the
> culture hero in it was also named George, and for some reason he had wooden
> teeth.
>
> Nobody really knows when Summer ends.  Some people say that it ends when
> the children are sent back to school.  Some people celebrate obscure
> seasons called "Football Season" and "Basketball Season."  On the coast we
> celebrate something called Hurricane Season -- this season mostly involves
> bribing Godzilla not to flood our villages again.
>
> We can all agree when Autumn begins.  By October, the leaves are turning
> crazy colors, and that's our signal to stop wearing summer colors.  Autumn
> doesn't last very long at all, because the last day of October is the first
> day of Christmas.  We call that day, "Hallowe'en."  The next big holiday of
> Christmas is called "Thanksgiving."  This day involves a ritual feast
> involving a giant bird, and for some reason we either wear black with
> buckles, or we wear feathers.  The purpose of this holiday is to prepare
> ourselves for Actual Christmas, which takes place near the end of December.
>  On this day we wear hats with a fuzzy bob on the end that serves no real
> purpose.
>
> In some years, Christmas ends on a day called Valentine's Day.  That's a
> day when we dress up in red and give each other paper images of hearts.  In
> other years Christmas ends on a day called Saint Patrick's Day.  That's the
> day when we dress up in green and give each other paper images of clovers.
>  Either way, from Saint Patrick's day to the beginning of April is when we
> have our brief Springtide, when the wisteria blossoms.
>
> So that's the way the seasons are actually divided by people who live where
> I live.  And, you know what ... I don't think I could have made up
> something as strange as this if I tried.
>

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