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PED-EM-L  February 2018

PED-EM-L February 2018

Subject:

Re: PED-EM-L Digest - 18 Feb 2018 to 19 Feb 2018 - Special issue (#2018-42)

From:

Jeff Pender <[log in to unmask]>

Reply-To:

Jeff Pender <[log in to unmask]>

Date:

Tue, 20 Feb 2018 09:41:17 -0500

Content-Type:

text/plain

Parts/Attachments:

Parts/Attachments

text/plain (31 lines)

Jason,

I have strong opinions, as virtually all of us do, and I am not hesitant to express them, hopefully in a respectful manner.  I am comfortable with anyone disagreeing with me, and having a good debate on the issue.   However, I am not looking to have my statements mischaracterized, either intentionally or unintentionally.   I was the person you were referring to when you said that someone on this thread “once knows a person owns a gun chooses therefore to no longer associate with them”.

To clarify, that isn’t what I said, nor what I meant.  I made a point that I choose to not own guns, or have one in my house.   I said that I choose not to spend time with someone that has a gun on their person, or next to them in their car.   I also said that I “pull away socially” from people that are “big time gun enthusiasts.”    That is clearly different from someone that owns a gun or two in order to protect their family.   I even made a distinct point of saying that I don’t think being a “big time gun enthusiast" makes them a bad person, b/c I absolutely don’t.  I have friends that own guns, and I respect their right to own one, even if I personally disagree.  They respect my view that I don’t want them bringing their gun to my house, just as I respect their right to have their gun in their house, and if I go to their home, then I have to respect their views/rights.  It works just fine b/c we are respectful of one another’s views.  Seems to me that I am “associating with them” quite well.  

If someone is a “big time gun enthusiast", we just view the world very, very differently, so socially we are likely not to be that close.  Does that matter?  I think not.   I know someone that is so into their guns that he has them on his counters, his coffee table, etc.  I choose not to go to his house b/c that makes me uncomfortable.  He seems just fine with that.  I have another friend that owns several guns and he keeps them locked in a gun safe at all times (other than when he is going to a range, etc).  I am perfectly comfortable in his home.   When a friend of mine that owns a gun comes to my house, I don’t preach at them about why they need to get rid of their gun, so they don’t feel uncomfortable in my home.  This seems like a respectful approach.  Once again, we are “associating” very well. 

I choose to limit my exposure to guns as much as is reasonably possible.  I also choose to limit my exposure to second hand smoke.  I also choose to not ride with anyone that insists on looking at their cell phone, or texting, while driving.  I also won’t ride with someone that has been drinking.  These are important things to me b/c I try to make choices that keep me safe/healthy.  I also choose not to buy a motorcycle (even though I have wanted one for years) b/c I know myself, and I know that I would become complacent and increase my likelihood for serious injury.    

People tend to flock more, and spend most of their time with, others that view the world similarly, or more importantly - with whom they share similar passions.  That isn’t to say that I can only be friends with people that I agree with on everything.   That would be impossible and nonsensical.  But, I tend to be closer with people that share my passions.    

I “associate” both professionally and personally with gun owners, and have friends who are gun owners, but I am likely not going to be best friends with a big time gun enthusiast.  I think both of us are just fine with that.  I am open with my views and respectful of theirs as well.  

I worry that guns in our culture are viewed too “positively” rather than as a choice made for protection.  Guns are celebrated, considered “cool” or “macho” all too often.  All it takes is to view a few YouTube videos to see that.   I worry about that mindset and what it says to our youth, just as I worry about the message being sent to them when I see a movie, music video, or anything else that celebrates a man “controlling” a woman, either physically or psychologically.  There is nothing wrong with a larger, and perhaps stronger, man “protecting” a woman (or any other person) in a situation of danger, but when that type of  “protective” role turns into one of “control” that becomes concerning (to me).  Likewise, there is nothing specifically wrong with a person having a gun (safely) in their home to protect themselves and their family, but when that view turns into “look how tough and cool I am with all my guns”, then that crosses the line into something concerning (to me).  Before you misunderstand, I am not referring to you or any other specific person, but just a general concept. 

Jeff





> On Feb 19, 2018, at 10:42 PM, Robert Finkelstein <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> 
>> once knows a person owns a gun chooses therefore to no longer associate with them 


For more information, send mail to [log in to unmask] with the message: info PED-EM-L
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