More from the Department of Silly Words... - andrew. Andrew Smith, Intheologus [log in to unmask] Lo! thy dread empire, Chaos! is restored; Light dies before thy uncreating word: Thy hand, great Anarch! lets the curtain fall; And Universal Darkness buries All. - Alexander Pope, The Dunciad, Book IV. ---------- Forwarded message ---------- The Washington Post recently had a contest for readers in which they were asked to supply suggested meanings for various words. The following were some of the winning entries ... Abdicate--v., to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. Carcinoma--n., a valley in California, notable for its heavy smog. Esplanade--v., to attempt an explanation while drunk. Willy-nilly--adj., impotent. Flabbergasted--adj., appalled over how much weight you have gained. Negligent--adj., describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie. Lymph--v., to walk with a lisp. Gargoyle--n., an olive-flavored mouthwash. Bustard--n., a very rude Metrobus driver. Coffee--n., a person who is coughed upon. Flatulence--n., the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller. Balderdash--n., a rapidly receding hairline. Testicle--n., a humorous question on an exam. Rectitude--n., the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a proctologist immediately before he or she examines you. Marionettes--n., residents of Washington who have been jerked around by the mayor. Oyster--n., a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions. Circumvent--n., the opening in the front of boxer shorts.